my-speck

i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

Raining and Kicking and return of Baby Brain May 20, 2009

Filed under: pregnancy — rakster @ 10:17 am
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Hello Speck,

its raining.  Its raining a lot in fact.  And has been all night and some of yesterday.  My limited supply of clothing is mostly wet on the verandah, so I can’t venture out in public until it ceases and dries.  My stomach has expanded to such an extent now that there are very limited clothes, even Maternity ones, that fit, so it is a bit dire.  But that’s ok.  You and I are having a pretty quiet time at the moment, so going around in stretchy yoga pants is totally an acceptable option.   So we’re taking it.

Days consist of waking up (you are waking about 6 am and having a big old play down there, which in turn wakes me), then staying in the warm bed as long as possible before finally dragging myself out to the shower.   Your dad is making us a lovely smoothie, then we leave for your Grandad’s house, where your uncle has invariably misplaced something and can’t find it in order to leave for school.  After that panic is over, we plug in our laptop and then tap-tap-tap away and work until R gets home after lunch.   Then we go home and see what your dad has been doing for the morning (currently finishing off the varnishing of your cot), and do some more tap tap tapping work.

Then its time to think about dinner and perhaps some exercise.   I look distractedly at the piles of washing and the stuff piled up in your room and the study that needs re-organising, get overwhelmed, so just chill out and watch TV or read a book.  You generally have a very active period from around 6pm onwards for a few hours, so I’ve taken to playing with you.  Simple games like pushing the foot around the belly.   Its very funny for me.  I think you like it too.   Small things amuse me at the moment.  Your dad thinks I am crazy (but in a good way.   He said fun & crazy & interesting).  Then we read a book for a while (currently on short stories again), and go to sleep.

The days are flying by at a roaring pace.  36 days to go according to the official count-down.   The weekends between now and when you come are chocka-block full with catching up with people, and going away, and a wedding and all sorts of stuff.  So please just wait a bit longer.   Until around 21 June would be good.   Then you’ll not only be full-term and ready, but I will have had a weekend away at a wedding and hopefully your room will be ready and my work will be finished.   And yes, work is much harder now.   Baby brain has returned with a vengeance.  It has come and gone about 5 times during the pregnancy.  Now its back.  I think the thing that is hardest is that I can only concentrate on one thing at once.  So my usual multi-tasking is just impossible to do.  And I have to write things down immediately I think of them / have a conversation with someone else I just can’t recall it five minutes later.  And if too much tries to squeeze into the brain all at once I just feel a bit overloaded & freak out.   So I’m taking one thing at a time.  Unfortunately work was supposed to be winding down but after the visit to Sydney last week there was a bunch more things I got given to do that have time constraints and what-not, so that is all full-steam ahead for a few more weeks.    So I am slowly working through each thing.

I’m a bit worried that you might come early.  I am still going to baby yoga at yogababy on Tuesday nights.  I’ve decided that even though there is a lot of talking, I like it more now.  I just take the bits I like from it and ignore the rest. And its an hour and a half where I can relax and think about you and feel pretty calm overall.   And its fun to gawk at all the other pregnant ladies.  There were about 26 of us last night.  All at least 18 weeks.   Its funny to see how differently everyone else carries their babies, and how big/small/different-shaped they are for how pregnant they are.  I think that overall my belly is a pretty big ball shape compared to others.  I am definitely bigger than a few women in the class who were at 39 weeks.   They were generally a bit less ball-shaped and round-all-over, wheras you really do look like I swallowed a big watermelon.   So yes, I’m thinking that you could come early, purely based on the size of my stomach.   Which of course is no real indication at all.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi.  I know you know I’m thinking about you, as we chat everyday and have a play too.  Your dad says hi, he also had a big long chat to you last night.

love you

mum

p.s. oh yeah, and your dad and I think we might have a name or two for you.  The boy one we’re pretty happy with – there have been omens over the past few days which are making me more sure.   The girl one we have a few more options but I’m sure we have something that will match you.   That is kinda fun.   You’re going to have a name!   But we’re going to wait until we meet you to decide – just to make sure.  And it will be secret to everyone else until then.   :)   I guess we could ask you and play the tap-tap game to see if you have a preference…

 

I told work that you were on your way today… January 5, 2009

Hi Speck,

I had to go back to work today :(.  Your dad stayed at home playing house husband when I dragged myself out of bed in the morning and made the trek over the bridges (but yes, I cheated and drove) to the office.  But it wasn’t too bad!

And I told them all about you – and it seemed to go pretty well! yay! yay! yay!

I was a bit worried about telling them that you were coming (I figure that now is far enough along that you should be ok, and not just before I go on holidays which wasn’t perfect timing), but I did it.  And my boss was fantastic – he seemed more excited by the news you are coming than worried about anything related to work.   We chatted for about 15 minutes about you etc after which point he eventually said, “oh yeah, I guess that means a different plan for the work” that we were sitting down to discuss.  I take that as a good sign.  My work is pretty accomodating, but I was still slightly worried about the whole thing – it doesn’t go well for everyone, I’ve read a bunch of news reports recently about discrimination in the workplace against pregnant women which is apparently unfortunately still really common in Australia…  Not that I thought that my work would be like that – they are generally really progressive which is one of the main reasons I still work there! But, it does mean a bunch of changes to the way I work for them, including us deciding to move back to Brisbane to have you come along, which does affect my ability to go to the office in a rather large way.   All in all, not sure how it will turn out, but first indications are that my boss is happy for me and sounds like we can be pretty flexible, and try to make sure my workload cuts down a bit by April this year but keep on working after that.  I’m sure we’ll talk more about it as time goes on and we’ve both had time to think about it a little more, but first indications are that I’ll be able to keep working and we’ll try to work something out.  Which I’m pleased about!

The other exciting part of what seems like finally (though its really only been a matter of weeks since we found out about you it seems like much longer) telling my work is that I can now tell some of my friends from work-related circles.  And surprise, surprise, there are some other people I know who are having babies around the same time as you’re due to join us.  Its almost plague proportions actually!  So that is exciting too!!!

Going to run as its really hot today and I just feel like lying down.  I went for a walk to the shops with your dad when I got home but it was so hot I got really overheated and flustered and had to have a break at the shops for 10 minutes as I felt really awful, then had a cold shower when I got home.  I’ve started exercising on the bike set-up in the lounge room but it was too hot for that too.   I might have to postpone my daily cycle until later tonight when its a lot cooler.

Hope you’re well, and as your aunt & I are now saying, grow, grow, grow

love mum