i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

A few photos… we are getting more and more mobile again! October 31, 2009

Hello Poogie,


quick post with a few shots of what we’ve been doing this week – various ways of getting you up and about around the house..


crutches and slinging the baby

poogie and I – mobile in the house with crutches and the sling.

So.  In the past few days I’ve been able to put a lot more weight on my foot, so you’ve been coming around the house with me in your sling.  And you seem a lot happier for it!  As am I…  No mishaps yet, but if they happen, they happen I guess.


poogie in the washing basket

doing the washing. You’re not really helping…

And your dad carries you about in the washing basket.  Not sure how much longer you’ll fit.


the new bumbo

bumbo for baby – you in the new seat . ready for first food..

And we bought you a bumbo…


eating the teething ring

eating the teething ring

and you are definitely teething.   Trying to eat everything.

you and me in the sling

poogie in the sling

Another poogie sling shot.


us on the computer - you're a quick learner

baby on the computer – you’ve a quick learner

So that’s the last few days in photos.


love you



First tooth October 28, 2009

Hello Poogie,

Well. Look what I found this morning: a new tooth coming through! You’ve been a bit grisly for the past few days, with a few screaming episodes in the afternoons. Yesterday was particularly bad, but you had your four-month immunisations yesterday so I figured it was due to that.

But, this morning I was rubbing your gums as you seem to like that at the moment, and felt that “grain of sand” feeling in your gum… On closer inspection, there is a patch of white and it appears to be a tooth! Mind you, not sure it’s growing in the right spot – it seems to be coming out of your gum beneath the tooth ridge rather than on it. But I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

Good for you.

Big you.


And the doctor has advised that the latest research about allergies suggests you should try to start on solids now, at four months. So this week we might give that a go. I’ve been teetering about it as there is so much literature out there that is contradictory – six months, four months, blah blah. But you’re growing a tooth, so I reckon you might be ready for a bit. So your Dad and I think we’ll try a little. And since I can’t walk properly yet it will be others that will have to help with the mess!

love you


P.S. You’re four months and one week old.


cankles and cackles October 23, 2009

Hello Little Poogie,

sleeping or not sleeping – it all happens in our house

after an atrocious day of not sleeping so well yesterday, you’re now sleeping.  Well, I lie.  You just woke up.  But I’m good here on the couch as your stellar Aunt Reegs has just gone in to get you.  And in tow is your friend G.  She’s two and is very keen to get to know you better after meeting you a few weeks ago.  So I suspect that I may be ok lying here on the couch and tap-tap-tapping away while I have the opportunity.  Full kudos again to your Aunt Reegs, who is looking surprisingly refreshed for a woman who crept in the door after 4am after a night of dinner, drinks and gay-star talent competition-watching and then manic dancing at Brisbane’s best and brightest gay venues with friends.  She is now up and looking after you, after getting me food, hanging out the laundry, and all the other sundry domestic tasks that I just can’t do with a broken ankle.


The trick you seem to be working on at the moment involves your voice. Specifically the modulation of your voice’s volume. We have been greeted with squeals of glee when you’re laughing – much like a cackling wizard. And howls of, well just howls of noise. And varying degrees of growls. Usually you growl when you’re hungry. But not anymore. Growls are ok whenever. And at whatever volume. Its all good fun.


I hate my ankle boot. It is not comfortable and when my foot is elevated causes me to lose feeling in my toes. Not great. And it woke me up about 58 times last night from the lack of toe feeling-pain. Have rung doctor. They suggest it’s too tight. Too tight. I’m not an idiot. Of course I’ve checked that. …… Grump grump. I shouldn’t have bothered ringing them. I guess the boots aren’t designed for comfort. ….Bah.

baby sign language and excitement

I’ve decided after speaking to a few mums about it at the Australian Breastfeeding Association meetings, and hearing various anecdotes from friends and family who’ve seen it in practice, that Baby Sign Language has a bunch of benefits and that you should try to learn it. Your dad and I both think it will be fun trying, even if it takes a while! And so I went on to the most wonderful library service of any city I’ve ever lived in: The Brisbane City Council library, and found four books on it. Clicked on them to reserve to my local library. And Voila! A few days and $1.50 or so later, they have arrived. Your dad got them for me yesterday and I’ve been reading the introductions in them and comparing. More posts to come… But Poogie, get prepared, I’m thinking about which signs to start with and you’re going to be subjected to my and your dad’s attempts at signing. I know that you don’t have full control of your hands yet, and have only just started to notice your feet, but I think if we start now then you’ll get there at some point, and by then your dad and I should know a fair few signs. I’ll keep you updated 🙂

Love and kisses (you love kisses and do the standard baby open-mouth version)


Meeting more of your family! and the pram-wheelchair-dad train October 21, 2009

Hello Poogie,

Happy fourth-month birthday for yesterday! Despite my being laid-up on the couch most of the day, the days are still flying by at a rapid rate. Too fast.

Excitement for you this week has been meeting your Canadian Grandma E & Grandpa. They arrived on Monday (it’s Wednesday now) and came to visit you briefly. There were lots of cuddles and talking. You seemed to like them too. Your Grandma came over to help look after you yesterday afternoon too – and you had a big play with her. Lucky you!

Today we’ve been out for the first time since my operation. Off to the hospital to get my cast off and changed for a boot. And while at the hospital a visit to see your Grandad who had an operation yesterday. He was good, but still in intensive care for monitoring so you weren’t allowed in. Just me. We were a sight at the hospital though: I wished we could have had someone take a photo! My foot was really sore as they took the cast off and put a new boot on it and had to manipulate the ankle a little to get it into the boot. Pain. I lay down for 20 minutes or so afterwards but couldn’t then crutch around the hospital to see your Grandad as it was too sore, so your dad got me a wheelchair. But you were there too, in your pram. So we formed a little train: you in front in your pram, me pushing your pram from within my wheelchair, and your dad pushing the wheelchair. Good thing the elevators are large. It worked though, which was the main thing.

So. Today’s pictures are about feet. My foot. And your feet. My foot is just plain sore. Your feet are growing at a rapid rate!

Love you


pointing your feet

moving your feet - practising kicking

kicking your feet

my ankle with the new surgical boot thingamy


Not Doing – Attachment Parenting. Doing – Neurotic Mother. October 16, 2009

Hello Poogie,

Well, the a week has passed since I’ve been made unable to walk. I’m now proficient at hobbling on my crutches to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out and managing to avoid all small-baby-toy obstacles that may have been placed in my way without falling over (touch wood. tonight will be the night I go flying now, won’t it?). And I’ve changed. Well, perhaps not changed, just a few personality traits have become more prominent…


And, the only one you have, I might add.


So cheers to my long-suffering sister, your Aunt Reegs. And to my waking-at-6am and not stopping until 10pm feverishly working, caring and cooking husband. I apologise. Retrospectively for the annoyances I’ve already piled on you and in advance for all the more horrid things I’m bound to do over the next few weeks. Sorry. I’m trying. I really am. But it is hard.

Poogie – I cried last night when you cried. I can’t get up to help you and cuddle you. And you dad was losing his patience a little bit ’cause you just screamed solidly in the ‘I’m dying’ mode for 20 minutes. I unhelpfully suggested that you should go in the sling. I knew I shouldn’t say anything, its just so hard to be there and hear you. I told you dad I wanted you. So he took you outside. I cried while you were gone. It is the mother-guilt thing. And the heartbreaking noise of your cries. And the frustration of being stuck, a prisoner on the couch. Not being able to pick you up.

Your dad quietened you down a lot, then bought you back in to me. He is a lovely man (patience of a saint). And I rocked and bounced you to sleep in my arms on the couch. It was good to watch your beautiful little face. And to know that I could settle you even if I can’t walk.

So. Yes. Attachment parenting. I don’t do it anywhere near the letter. I think its good for babies to have some alone time, and some time on the floor. Well, its good for you, you like it. And sometimes you get annoyed at being held, and are happy when we put you on the floor. Maybe its just the change in perspective. Anyway, though I don’t do attachment parenting to the letter, I do think that in general, lots of baby-wearing is good too. So I generally sling you about frequently. When I’m doing the washing. When we go for a walk that isn’t too long. No need for an excuse. Anytime is generally good. You have 4 different slings, three of which get lots of use.

  • Baby Bjorn for long walks. It seems to support you well and is good when you fall asleep. And good for jobs when I need both of my hands or are bending over.
  • Slingalong for short stints.  Its great now you’re bigger to go with when we go in and out of the car, ’cause its so fast to put on and off, and you love sitting in it.  But we still have to hold you with one hand, so not good for long distance walking or hand-busy things like cooking..
    the slingalong baby sling with poogie and dad

    the slingalong baby sling with poogie and dad

    sling loading poogie

    sling loading poogie

  • the sling that is just made out of a bit of material.  From the wear your baby website.  Easy to make, lots of ways to wear & experiment.  And you like it.  good for bouncing you around it.

    wear your baby - forward in the sling

    wear your baby – forward in the sling

Right. So why am I neurotic??

Because I’m having to restrain myself from saying, each time you cry and your dad or your aunt look after you:

Maybe he wants to go in the sling.
Try the sling.
Have you tried this kind of sling yet?
What sling are you going to use?
Are you just going to carry him?
No, you should really try the sling.
He loves the sling….

And I’m failing at least 3 times a day.

See. Neurotic. And that is just one example.

Sorry family. Love you Poogie.


P.s. Note to self.  Relinquish control of parenting techniques to those who are actually caring for the baby.  Relinquish control of parenting theories to thoughts when the baby is screaming and someone else is dealing with it. ..

P.P.S..  You still are breastfeeding, of course, and this is still something only I can do.  And you and I have our time to feed, and for the most part, its still beautiful.  I don’t need to be able to walk to do it. And I can see you still love me.

P.P.P.S.  And you still come and play with me on my belly (I’m lying down on the couch most of the day).  And we move outside to the day bed on the front verandah and look at the trees.  And talk and tickle and place there too.  So I’m not doing too bad with attachment.  Just can’t sling you about like normal.


Bored mother. October 12, 2009

Filed under: healthcare,Parenting,Raising a Child — rakster @ 10:08 pm
Tags: ,

Hello Poogie!

You’re bored with me (not being able to pick you up and sling you about in our normal pattern). And I’m just simply bored.

On couch.

Elevated foot.

chilling with mum's broken ankle on the day bed

You learnt to suck your thumb today (as opposed to the previous efforts which was just whatever body part fit in at the time).

Bored mum.

Love you

poogie's first attempts at thumb sucking. Lets hope it doesn't last.


i officially have a cankle. Yes, singular. And you don't like bottles all that much! October 11, 2009

Hello Poogie,

Well. Today is Sunday. I’ve just given you a big feed and you are grunting away in your cot. We’re hoping you’ll have a sleep, but you seem to be resisting. I can’t come and get you as I’m lying on the day-bed, foot up on a pile of pillows. I have a big fat ankle underneath a leg that is in plaster. The ankle is now offically reconstructed. Despite wishing on Friday that I could go back and undo the decision to have it done, its all ok. I got the ankle operated on last Thursday, and we came home on Friday. Right now I can make it to the bathroom and managed to mostly shower myself this morning, but that is the extent of my mobility. I’ve got crutches which I’m still learning how to use (I’m giving myself gold stars for finally after three days having come up with a way of using them to get up from the toilet – that was tough before). So you’re relying on your dad for all assistance with moving and care. Apart from the feeding. You stilll come visit me for that. And you do come and play with me: sitting on my tum and doing some talking a few times a day.

So. Thursday went pretty well overall. You and your dad came in with me to the hospital at an ungodly hour in the morning, then we waited for hours as I was the last operation on the morning’s surgery list. You had a good feed and were happily sleeping in your pram when I got put into the wheelchair & wheeled off down into the basement of the hospital for the surgery. I was a bit nervous, but feeling ok about it. That was until I was sitting by myself in my wheelchair in the pre-op area when I heard the screams and cries of a small boy. I just lost it at that point and started bawling. Good timing as the anaethetist came to put in my canula at that point. She explained that where I was was connected to the recovery room, so the little boy was just waking up from having his adenoids out. And wanted his mum. It was horrible to listen to. I felt so sorry for the kid.

The surgery itself was fine. I had a spinal anasthesia so that I could breastfeed you straight away, so I was awake for the operation. I had a mild sedative to keep me calm and just chatted with the anaethetist and the anaethestic nurse while the surgeons did my ankle behind a sheet. While I was getting operated on, your dad took you for a walk outside. I had expressed some breastmilk for you and he had just taken you to your grandad’s office and was going to heat it up when the nurse called him to say I was back in my bed on the ward. So you came and found me and immediately had a great big feed and a cuddle.

in the hospital bed with baby

you and me in the hospital right after I got back from surgery

You and your dad then stayed with me for the rest of the day, going home at around 7pm after I’d given you two huge night feeds. It was hard to see you go home with your dad: I’d not spent a night apart from you since you were born. I cried a little bit.

you and your dad going home at night... leaving me at the hospital. the view from my bed.

Your dad tells me that you were very well behaved at home. He gave you your nightly bath, then tried to give you another feed with some expressed breastmilk from a bottle. Apparently you looked very confused about the whole thing, especially when you tasted the milk from the bottle. And you weren’t really into it, I think you only managed a few sucks. But you slept right through the night as normal anyways. He got up after five in the morning and heated you some more breastmilk, and when you woke you were still a little confused by it all, but since you were hungry you had about 80ml. Enough to keep you going for a while.

I had a bit of a shocking night in the hospital myself, the lady in the bed beside me fell out of her bed at 10pm and there were nurses going back and forth for the next four hours. Then there were the normal checks every hour. I woke at 5 am with the sun. Ready to go home. I called your dad at 6:30 to check what time you were coming in, to see if I should express to empty my very full boobs. Thankfully, he was already getting ready, and you guys arrived at just after 7. Your Aunt Reeg brought you in while your dad went to park the car. I gave you a big feed and you seemed happy. A few hours later we were able to get out and go home. Yay. Me wobbling on my new crutches.

SO.. All in all, it worked out well. I was really nervous about the whole thing. It was a bit more difficult than expected as the hospital was really not very baby-friendly, and sharing a room with four people wasn’t great with you, but you were really well-behaved and so it was bearable. And most important, you and I are both ok.

you playing on my tum as I lie on the day-bed with my foot elevated. My cast in the background.

Since then you’ve been looked after by your Dad and Aunt R, and have been loving all the attention from family who have dropped by to see us. I think you’re a little grumpy at me for not picking you up or playing with you quite as much as normal (well, maybe confused rather than grumpy). But you’re generally still your smiling little self.

Love you

ps. and you seemed to sense that I was upset in the hospital when I was in a bit of pain post-op, and you were so good about it. And again when we got some bad news on Friday. Big hugs. thank-you.

you love the attention! three aunts in attendance.


Inconsolable October 2, 2009

Filed under: Parenting — rakster @ 3:16 pm
Tags: , , ,

You know when someone screams like they are being murdered? Or are dying? Well, you’ve just done that almost non-stop for the past two hours. And I’m exhausted.

We have done two 25 minute walks. You have settled a little after each one. then woken. five minutes later. screaming again.


you woke again and then had a screaming fit. a bit of a breastfeed. then some cuddling. you are now crying but just a little bit. I’ve put you in your cot. I just can’t carry you around anymore, and its not screaming now. Just a few little upset noises.

breathe. breathe. breathe.

I’m exhausted. Its 32 degrees or something like that. Walking around with a baby tied to me during the heat of the day wasn’t my idea of fun when I woke up this morning. But that’s what I’ve had to do.

You were fine this morning. In fact, you were hilarious. You had a whole 5 minute conversation with a visitor to the house which consisted of you laughing and giggling and talking.


love mum

ps. got new togs yesterday in the post. I am going to go swimming this afternoon whether you like it or not. As many swims before next week’s operation as I can fit in. For then its no swimming for ages…