i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

Fluttering and getting more solid around the waist December 19, 2008

Hi Speck!

Long time no write. I’m still making my way up the coast to Brisbane with your dad and grandparents, so it’s a bit harder to write – I’m on my iphone (which reminds me, I’ve been meaning to do an ‘historical’ post about the things that have been newsworthy and just synonymous with this year – time capsule like, but that can come later when I have a proper keyboard available).

Anyway, this morning I’m lying in a bed with a view straight out over the pacific ocean at Scott’s Head, and I can hear the waves breaking below. It’s pretty gorgeous. Your dad got out of bed before the sun came up, and I assume is off fishing somewhere down on one of the beaches (just so you know he never seems to catch much but derives hours of pleasure from just standing there doing it, which is great for him!). I stayed here in bed and slept in a bit longer as I slept badly again last night.

In addition to having to pee at least 5 times during the night ’cause your house is squishing my bladder, I had strange and disturbing dreams yet again. I’ve been having them for a while but they were a bit more sporadic previously, now they tend to be most nights and they are keeping me awake! I can’t recall last nights one now, but the one before that involved me swimming in a waterhole somewhere in the bush. There were two very large platypii (is that the plural??) that were on the edge near some rotting logs who came in while I was swimming and swam around too. Your dad was there too but I couldn’t see him, just hear his voice. That’s all I remember, apart from a feeling that the platypii were listening too and really wanted to swim with us.

No idea what that was all about but I felt happy when I woke up, and went down to the beach for a big long walk. I had been the night before too and was hoping to see more dolphins – the night before I’d seen a massive pod of at least 50 or so, with around 10 of the pod really close to the shore and doing tricks in the waves as the sun set. It was pretty cool – leaping totally out of the water, surfing the waves almost totally into the shore and generally having a great frollick. I didn’t get a dolphin repeat yesterday morning, but did have a good walk then a rather cool but invigourating swim.

And you seem to really enjoy the swimming and the walking. I’m pretty sure that I felt you flutter down there when I was lying down afterwards. My stomach is expanding at what I think is a very rapid rate (though unfortunately I think it’s due in equal parts to your presence and the ice-cream craving/fetish/obsession I have developed and have been frequently feeding). I can’t seem to suck my stomach in at all anymore, it’s simply just solid. All the better to feel you flutter with I suppose, but it is a very strange feeling to be expanding at a rate which is visibly detectable. Normally your weight fluctuates so slowly that it’s undiscernable until you look at a photo over months, but not with you. Boobs the size of rockmelons (they were large to start with but jeepers!) and a tummy trying to catch up.

I feel like a chat to you but in a disjointed holiday way, so might just leave it there and share some pictures with you from the other night’s walk. I thought a bit about you, and chatted out loud (there was no-one else on the beach), and generally just stared at the waves and setting sun.

Hope you’re well, you can look forward to more swims today!

Love mum