Well. According to the Bureau of Meteorology’s great website, its 31.8 degrees celcius today. Which is totally unseasonally hot weather. Its still August, so in theory we are in winter. I don’t think I remember a winter day in August in my lifetime when it was over 30 degrees. You are sweating, as am I. I’ve been trying to drink lots of water. I think I’ve gone through at least 2.3 litres already, and its only 3pm. You’re not so happy. Just a little grumpy. I’ve got you dressed in just a nappy, and at present you’re asleep on our bed. You had a HUGE scream for about 20 minutes earlier today, unlike anything heard before. Mostly in your dad’s ear. He jiggled you about and tried a number of things to calm you. You’re generally such a placid little happy person, it was quite distressing to see you scream to the bottom of your lungs for 20 minutes. And it hurt the ears. After a cool bath, a change of nappy and some jiggling you finally decided that you did want some food and so you got a breastfeed, which seemed to calm you down. As I fed you I watched the colour in you drain from beet-red down to a milder pink then normal looking. I think it was a combination of the screaming and the heat that had got you so red. And I nearly panicked, but managed to remember to just chill, take your temperature to ensure you were ok (you were a normal temperature) and just make sure I kept calm…
my baby-mum lesson of the week
So. I wanted to let you know a lesson I’ve learnt and do need to try to stick to – it just seems to help with your sleeping and feeding, and my sanity. First part is just to take things with you one day at a time. If I wake up and I don’t feel well, I’m tired or you seem cranky, its totally ok for me to just cancel any plans we might have and just relax. Which included leaving the dishes in the sink if needed. Yes, when you reach parenthood I’m sure the books you’ll read / advice you’ll be given will stress this, but it’s much harder to do than it sounds. I’m getting there. I don’t think your dad is quite on par with my need to do this some days, but my sanity needs it. Not every day, not even all that often, but when I do need to do this, I really need to. Something like a mental health day from work. Though I still have to look after you, just have a day when I try to do less. Unscheduled.
The next step is my having learnt a rule – only one thing / outing a day (apart from walks, they don’t always count). Again, much harder to do than it sounds. Its a big momentum change from not having a baby like you to look after. So harder ’cause its so foreign. I’ve found myself on some days thinking, “oh, I’ll just pop out and get x done too”… Hours later when we get home and I can’t collapse in a chair from exhaustion because I have to look after you and you’re cranky ’cause we did too much – I regret this decision. I’ve been a bit slower than I perhaps should have learning this lesson – I’m blaming it on my hormones and tiredness. But now I think I’ve got it. So. We plan a maximum of one outing a day now. Sometimes it could be one outing with two stops – today was mum’s learning group at the Child Health Clinic and then grocery shopping as the shops are next door to the clinic. But that is it. Now we are home and I’m washing and you’re sleeping and we won’t go out again.
So. I’m writing it down to convince myself that its a rule. ‘Cause every time I break it everything is harder. Yesterday it got broken, and I was exhausted and didn’t sleep so well. You weren’t too bad..
Off to drink some more water and make some more milk.
love your boobie mum