Today I’ve
- fed you at 3:30 am
- fed you at 5:30 am
- said goodbye to your dad as he left the bed to sleep somewhere else ’cause you’re such a noisy eater at 5:35 am
- been vomited on in bed by you at 6:38 am
- attempted to mop-up the vomit in the bed, on me, and on you at 6:39 am (you kept sleeping)
- vaguely thought, “oh shit, I only washed the sheets, the undersheet, the duvet cover and aired the duvet yesterday, great timing!” at 6:40 am as I drifted back to sleep
- been woken by your thrashing arms against my face at 7:08 am (you kept sleeping)
- said goodbye to your dad at 7:24 am as he left the house
- tried to get back to sleep at 7:25 am
- worked out that you had woken up and were wide-eyed at 7:27 am
- tried to ignore the fact it was morning at 7:28 am
- conceded at 7:36 am that your grunting, exertion and ‘poo-face’ facial expression was consistent with the fact you were actually pooing.
- calculated at 7:36 am that you hadn’t pooed for at least 48 hours
- determined at 7:36 am that immediate evasive action was required unless I wanted a pooey and vomity bed.
- lost track of time
- moved you to the bathroom, removed your nappy and assisted you to complete the poo in the bathroom sink in an EC-style manner.
- laughed as you concentrated and stared intently at yourself in the mirror as you finished pooing
- complimented myself on my fortuitous movement of your bum back over the sink after I thought you’d finished. Was amazed at the amount of poo one small baby can contain.
- gave you a quick bath in the sink
- took the nappy bucket down to the laundry
- scrubbed your pooey nappy from this morning
- put on two loads of laundry – your nappies and your clothes
- had a play and a chat with you on the floor.
- assembled my bike and the bike trainer on the back deck (having brought the bike up to the back deck three days ago and the trainer up yesterday). Step 3 complete!
- located my bike cleats (in the very back of the closet – who would have thought)
- cycled for 12 minutes (woo hoo! exercise – ahoy) while simultaneously coo-ing to you to keep you calm (as you were feeling abandoned from the look on your face)
- toasted a muffin and got some juice and managed to wolf it down
- fed you again at 8:50 am while simultaneously reading my email
Gee its busy being a mum
love your attempting to get back into regular exercise mum
ps. oh, and I wrote this post at the end of the feed and its now only 9:06 am.
I feel exhausted just reading that……