i'm pregnant and it's going to be a rollercoaster

week 25! 102 days to go. I’m starting to think about things like whether to dispose, nappy system or just good old simple nappies? But mostly I’m still thinking about food. Figs this weekend. March 15, 2009

Heya Speck,

102 days till you’re slated to join us.  Apparently you’re just like a little baby inside my uterus – now you’re just getting bigger and bigger.  I’ve already put on 12-13 kg, so I expect I’m going to go above the averages as everything I’ve read tells me that you just grow a lot from now on.  I can still see my feet.  And I can still see my fanny.  Two things which will apparently disappear soon.   Well, disappear from my normal line of sight.  More ce la vie.  If I get bigger I get bigger. I’m hungry most of the time.  So I eat.  Not bad food, just a lot of it.  I figure you need it.

On the eating front – this weekend its fresh figs.

fresh figs

fresh figs

They are in season, so I bought a box.  Made fig ice cream yesterday, which tastes good but is all the wrong texture.  My ice cream maker (well, actually your grandmother K’s – I stole, I mean borrowed it years ago) has finally given up the ghost.  I’ve been contemplating buying a new one and keep wavering.  But after the fig ice cream taste being so good but texture so bad, I am convinced we need one.  For your sake too – homemade ice cream is sooo much better for you than bought stuff.  Not to mention the taste.  So I’m going to finally invest and buy one with an in-built compressor.  It is just too hot here in Australia to make any more than one batch in the variety that you bowl in the freezer.  And when I make ice cream or sorbet I generally want to make a bit at once.  If I have to do all those dishes, I may as well make it worth the effort.  Yay.   I am looking forward to a new one.  Maybe I can make your dad an ice cream cake for his birthday with at least three different flavours. That sounds like a plan.  You like ice cream too.  I can tell.  That’s why I want to eat it all the time.  More than normal even.  And fresh is better.  So ice cream maker purchase here I come.

fig ice cream

fig ice cream

What else? Well, I have been reading about nappies.  Its all too confusing.  I think I’d like to not use disposables all the time, so I started to look at the difference between plain old old-fashioned nappies, and the new washable nappy systems.   I am now just thoroughly confused.  Think I might buy some of both and see how it goes.  Or how you go. Who knows?  And how do you try to decide between the different brands without trying them?

Hope you’ve enjoyed the figs.  Tonight for dinner is fig, blue cheese, almond and rocket salad.  That is my plan anyhow.

love you



Saturday Night Fever. Or was it Staying Alive?? February 24, 2009

Hi Little Speck.

What is going on down there?? You are kicking like a demon.  The kicks are so strong I sometimes exclaim involuntarily.  Like at dinner on Sunday night, when I think you went for the seventies disco workout pose and flung your leg down and out and your opposite arm up, mimicing John Travolta or someone like that, all in one hit.  It was such a strong and strange feeling – two spots at once, that I yelped out aloud in the restaurant.  Keep it down in there will you! I like to dance too, but you have to dance to suit the situation.

We might have to put some music on at home tonight and have a boogie though – you are going slightly beserk down there this afternoon.   And you are pushing up at the top of where you come to in my belly now (about 2 cm above my distended belly button), rather than just kicking at the bottom.  I take it back.  You are doing loop-the-loops and just kicking or throwing or whatever away down there like a crazed thing.   I wonder if you know that it is making me a bit tired?  I’ve had a very long week at work already even though its only Tuesday.  And your Dad left Sydney on Monday morning after dropping me at work for the drive back to Brisbane.  So I am hanging out with Cokemeister, who forced me to watch the Oscars last night and I stayed up too late…  Retribution is your kicking..

Love you


so all your bits appear to be in the right spot, you've 5 fingers and an upper arm 2.19 cm long. February 3, 2009

Hiya Speck!

good news – all is well with you and you have 4 chambers in your heart, a lot of blood going around in different directions in your body (and seemingly – from the technician’s comments – you importantly have it flowing on both sides of your bladder), you have a stomach, kidneys which have a lot going on, a nose, lips, mouth and fingers and toes. In fact, the scan was quite exhaustive and lots of you was measured. You are in the normal ranges for it all. Your nose bridge bit got measured (why??).. And your upper arm (humerus) was 2.19 cm long. That was the only one I managed to ask about. The rest was too quick. Its all on the last page of the video we got.

Anyway. It was a little strange to see you down there. You are much bigger than last time and you were moving around like a crazed thing. In fact, you were kicking very hard. No I know why I can feel it – it was odd, but you were kicking at the same time as the technician was checking your legs, and I could see you kicking and feel it (right on my bladder – which was full due to the scan so it was very uncomfortable) at the same time. Bit freaky. So, you kick really hard by drawing your little legs right up almost parallel with your spine (very flexible you are!) and then moving them down and extending your feet all in one big very swift movement. I.e. A huge big kick very hard and fast. So that’s what I can feel. Your dad laughed a lot. You also look like you’re sucking or attempting to suck on the area around my placenta. Photos…

Speck - you at Week 19!

Speck - you at Week 19!

Woot! Exciting. I don’t think we need any more scans, so that might be the last time we see you before you come out. You have big thighs. Round and wide at the top like mine. And you have indents on your feet like mine too. We got a photo. Maybe all babies have them? I don’t know.

Speck - its you again!

Speck - its you again!

Anyway, I love you! I am excited and your dad is too.

Your foot at 19 Weeks.

Your foot at 19 Weeks.

Keep at it! Love mum


Yoga mark two January 29, 2009

Good Morning Speck,

How are you? Very quiet down there again, perhaps you’re busy digesting the large amount of food I have consumed in the past 24 hours. Some days I seem to just need to eat a regular amount yet other days I just feel like I’m starving and need to eat everything in sight. Yesterday was one of those days.

Your dad and you will be pleased to know that despite my tendency to eat relatively crap food and make little effort when it’s just me, I went and did a big healthy shop when I got home from work on Monday night, so we’ve been snacking on guacamole, peaches, nectarines and almonds mostly. One of my friends from work made me a huge batch of Indian rice custard after hearing about my recent addiction, so as that has no sugar but just reduced milk that is pretty good too. And I made palak paneer last night so we both got our spinach quota for the week.

What else? Well, I seem to be moody again. I helpfully told someone at work today who pissed me off only ever so slightly that ‘I don’t give a s* anyway, I’m having a baby and will be leaving and won’t be here when it happens anyway’.. Mmm, not really what I was thinking, just an over zealous outburst.   Your fault again.

Also went along to yoga last night.  Coke-meister bailed on me but I went anyway.  It was a normal level 1-2 yoga class at the great studio I went to with you dad for a while over a year ago.  We both enjoyed our courses there a lot, and the teachers are really good.   It was interesting – I got to do a few different exercises while everyone else did headstand and shoulderstand and a few other abdominally-taxing exercises, and I have to step in rather than jump, but it was good.  I think I’ll keep going to pregnant yoga when I can also, but this is a good option for me for the next period as we move back and forth between Sydney and Brisbane.  My ankle is much better and I have got a brace for it which helps with remembering to keep it in mind.

I didn’t feel you kicking around much last night but I think you were definitely on the left side still – you put me off-balance slightly.

Hope you’re well.

love you



Week 17: 13cm and you wee a lot! January 16, 2009

Hi Speck,

So, Happy Week 17! You are apparently 13 cm long this week, 150 grams and you wee every 45 minutes. And then you drink it when you take big gulps of amniotic fluid. Gross. No wonder kids (and I guess adults alike) love peeing in the bath. It must remind them somehow of the months they spent doing the same in their own little growth-in-utero phase.

I haven’t felt you moving around too much over the past few days, but that could be because I have had to keep my feet up and not do too much – sprained an ankle at frisbee on Tuesday night. I’m blaming it on you – well, on the extra weight I’m carrying around that just put a bit too much strain on an ankle trying to turn quickly and stepping in a hole at the same time. I think, unfortunately, that as there are only a few weeks left in the season, that will be it for me. I might head along for the finals to eat pizza and chat with people but otherwise not much chance of more playing until after you’re born. I think my team were a bit worried that I was overdoing it anyway, so are kinda happy that I wrote myself out.

its worse than it looks. I'm a limping wounded person.

its worse than it looks. I’m a limping wounded person.

my strapped ankle

my strapped ankle

Its also been boiling hot – almost 40 degrees for the past few days.  So moving greatly even without an injured ankle is a large effort.  I’m looking forward to a beach trip tomorrow to cool off.

Hope you’re well, thinking of you. Don’t ingest too much pee!

love mum


woohoo! Holidays December 12, 2008

Hi Speccie,

guess what! we’re on holidays! Its official, work has finished for the year! Just those nasty exams tomorrow to knock over, then we’re free!

By the way, was that you giving me a sharp kick in the kidneys at around 12:45? It was such a sharp, unusual pain that went away really quickly, that I suspect you were trying to stretch the boundaries of your home. Please keep it down in there if it was you – it was very painful. Otherwise, sorry to accuse you of things which aren’t down to you – I guess you have no real way of refuting it. I guess you’re stuck with that until you’re able to talk. In fact, I can blame you for everything from now until then really.

I look foward to it. I can see the conversations now:
Your dad: “Where did all the lollies go?!! What’s mine is yours and I want some lollies!”.
Me: “Oh my goodness, you little monster. Speck, I can’t believe you got into the lollies again!”.
Your dad: “I thought Speck was still on milk”.
Me: “Well, I guess he/she has moved on quickly. Fast developer, just like his/her dad :)”.

Awesome. It sounds like it might just work out. There have to be some compensations for carrying you around for nine months!

Hope you’re as excited as I am.  Look forward to lots of swims and lazing on the beach.   I might read out-loud to you if you’re lucky.

Love you



…grow grow grow…. December 2, 2008

Hey Speck!

well.  Long time no chat.  I can’t feel you moving around and I think it is still going to be a while before we can commune by touch through my belly.  So chatting with you this way is all I have for a bit longer.  Apparently your dad is going to be able to hear your heartbeat through my belly with his ear at some point too.  Again, I suspect its quite a while off, but that hasn’t stopped him trying.  He hasn’t rasberried you in a few days – but don’t feel neglected, he is just busy cooking for me while I study, and getting excited about your other grandparents arriving to visit from Canada.

Its a bit hot today, it feels like summer is finally here.  Yesterday was warm but it still cooled down last night.  It was a funny night – the people up the road have a yearly Christmas  decorations / turn on the lights drink/party on the street outside their house and we went along to say hello.  All in all about 50 people and then assorted children, with a slow start but then building to taking over the street and standing around chatting and gossiping.  We’ve lived in the same two streets for almost two years, so we know a few of them.  I was still surprised at how many little kids were around – I only see the ones who live across from us, but there were heaps of the little munchkins running around everywhere.  At 8:30 there was a 10 second countdown from the crowd on the street – where all the kids stood at the front & held hands & looked & then screamed with delight as the Christmas lights of the house with the party were ceremoniously turned on.  All in all I think I’m still a bit incredulous that we’ll have to look after you and you’ll be one of those independent, loud, screaming little bundles of energy.  Welcome, but still slightly unreal.

Otherwise your dad and I are well, still making sure we eat well – you’ll have to let him know that you really enjoyed the oven-baked falafels so he cooks them more frequently!  Hope you are busy growing your arms and legs and other bits.

love you

p.s. you better be growing a lot because I am increasing in size at a rapid rate.  I think its actually disproportionately rapid.  I’m hoping I look as fat as I do mainly because I am constantly totally filled with gas, but unfortunately I suspect that is not the case.


Good-day November 8, 2008

Filed under: pregnancy — rakster @ 1:34 pm
Tags: , , ,

Howdy Dudy Speccie,

We have some good news for you – we’ve found someone to help bring you into the world when you choose to come on out, so it won’t be your dad in the kitchen with a carving knife (phew! that would have been messy).  Your poor dad was so freaked out when we rang about ten obstetricians on Wednesday and couldn’t find one as they were all full for June next year already – he went white and started to sweat a lot; masking his anger.  I kept trying to tell him to be happy, but it appears he is almost as much of a worry wart as I am.  Anyway, you have someone here in Sydney and someone in Brisbane, so whenever you choose to pop on out it should be ok.   That is, unless you choose to pull the plug before then cause you don’t like it, in which case we’ll both be really sad.  But it’s still a one in four possibility.   Please do hang on in there, we’re waiting for you out here with great excitement, promise we’ll do some fun stuff!  And you can’t leave without having tried stinky blue soft cheese, which you are NOT getting at the moment as it is off my eating list, so you simply HAVE to get big enough to try that ’cause it really is one of life’s best things.  In my opinion.

Also, there are now more people eargerly awaiting your coming.  Your grandparents now all know about you and seem very excited.  I bit of surprise, I think, but happy.

What else is happening?  Well, I came home last night and after eating two icy poles and some fake cheese promptly went straight to bed for a nap while your dad was at the pub with friends.  I awoke some hours later feeling just as grumpy as when I had gone to sleep earlier, but with more mussed-up hair.  Your dad came home and wanted a kiss and I felt like telling him to jump off the harbour bridge.  That’s how good it was yesterday.  I tried to explain that I was feeling a little testy, but I think it was reading Kaz Cooke week 7 that made us both feel better.   Apparently its common for me to feel like I would rather he not touch me unless with a 10 foot barge pole, and for me to just want to sleep all weekend.  Pity that isn’t an option.

Today is rainy but a kind of nice, stay in bed and rest day.  I had uni all morning and have just got home, think I need a cat-nap before I attempt to write an assignment which I have to finish by tonight.  Erk.  Not so fun.

I can’t believe that all women wait so long for babies to grow.  How do you keep a secret like this for so long & then how do you cope with a growing body for another six months after that?  By the way, if the growth in my boob size over the past week is any indication, I’m not going to be able to stand up due to the sheer weight of my bossoms when I’m more pregnant.  None of my bras fit.  Since the beginning of this week I have been daily washing a single bra that is made of stretchy material and even still cuts in a bit.  I hope they shrink again at some stage.  Its coming up to summer too – so I’m going to have to find a new swimming costume that actually covers enough skin – I suspect my old one is already going to be indecent.

So, going for a nap.  Hope you are well, thinking of you (in a non-panicked way today, yesterday was a panic, day before so-so)…

love you



hot today! can you feel summer in there? October 31, 2008

Filed under: emotion,pregnancy — rakster @ 2:56 pm
Tags: , , ,

Hey Speck,

how are you doing? Are you as hot as I am? Its a scorcher today & I’m feeling slightly queasy.  Again.  I assume its you making me feel this way.  And exhausted.

A friend rang last night & let me know that she is 13 weeks pregnant.  Due May 3.  So you may be relatively close to the child of one of my friends.  That might be fun.  I hope you are.
I’m still worried about you, but at least it hasn’t seemed as persistent a worry over the past few days.  This could be because I’ve been busy, or just ’cause I know its c’est la vie.  All I can do is keep on eating well and hope you’re all ok down there.  Next Wednesday should give us a better idea.

So, your dad and I bought a new car yesterday.  We’ve had the same car since we bought it with a loan from your grandad when we were both in uni.  The old car, while still reliable, was just getting a bit too old, and most of all, it didn’t have air conditioning.  The new one is a year old, has full air con and tinted windows.  And its all wheel drive & has a bunch of safety features so it won’t be such a scary experience driving beside lorries on the highway.  We’re both pretty excited – it will be fun to be able to enjoy doing things like going camping for the weekend again: it really was trying in our old car, loaded down with stuff and excruitiatingly hot in summer.  And, we’ll be able to hear the music playing as we don’t have to leave the windows down all the time to keep ourselves cool.  That’s our news.

Your dad says hello to you every morning and goodnight every night.  Do you feel him giving you a pat through my tum?  He gave you a hug this morning when I was feeling grumpy and didn’t want one but insisted it was his right to give you a hug and therefore I had to let him.  Fair call I thought, though again, hope you appreciated it!

You can look forward to your first swim in the ocean this weekend if the weather stays warm enough!

suck in the good vitamins I’ve been ingesting.

love you!